Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The conversation with Kristin

I mentioned in the comments of a previous post About Us a conversation I had with a friend that I still remember vividly. She asked me to remind her of it...

J. was still a year or two away for me, but K. had recently begun courting her future husband and she and I were discussing courtship, marriage and other such things that occupy the minds of teen-age girls. There was a several year (can't remember exactly?) age difference between K and her young man and we were talking about how people might view that and whether or not that was socially acceptable in our time. I mentioned to her my grandparents marriage of (at the time) nearly fifty years and the 18 years age gap between them. I expressed my intention of marrying a man at least three years older than myself, as I thought that would ensure a stable and mature relationship. K was skeptical, however...

But how are you so sure you'll marry someone older?

I just know it's the best thing for me.

But what if you meet a godly young man who's just perfect for you but a few years younger than you or something like that?

Oh, that won't happen.

But what if it does and what if you fall in love??

Well.... I just won't fall in love with someone younger than me. I just won't. That's all there is to it.

Haha, the joke's on me! There was more to the conversation, but the part that looms largest in my mind is that-- for obvious reasons.

P.S. For those of you who don't know us well, J isn't 30 yet ;)


Buckeroomama said...

I felt exactly the same way --i.e., that I could not date anybody younger than I am. Hubby is almost 3 years older. :) Both SIL's, however, are older than their husbands --one by 8 years, the other by 3. It doesn't really matter in the end whether we marry someone older or younger or the same age. What really matters is the "connection." :)

Hosanna said...

As you know, Kevin is 13 years older than me. That was a huge big part of Kevin's delay in expressing interest in me when we first met...... but that is another story for another day; and for another blog. :)

Scot and Kristen said...

Lisi, I remember this conversation!! It's so funny because in my mind you had it ALL together. I mean, from the layout to your dream home, the way the trees would be in the yard, to the feminine details in your hope chest.... I always enjoyed listening to all your creative ideas. Oh and the WEDDING ideas; Scot and I owe it to your brains and talent that our wedding didn't flop. I did always think you would be an awesome wife to somebody... Which I told some people, but I don't think one of those was Jeremiah. Looks like he noticed himself!! But about the age talk... you were settled on the guy being 12 years older than you and having a houseful of boys, (wasn't that #12 too?). Looking back, it was no use having the conversation; seeing as you left to go chop vegetables for our reception with the notorious 'J'!!!

septembermom said...

That debate went on in my head too. Although my husband and I are only 18 months apart, I wondered when we met at teenagers if the marriage would work. Well, we're still here :)