Saturday, November 1, 2008
OOOPS
So, actually, instead of this, I bought this by accident (can you tell the difference!!??). So I have to go back here and try again. But in the meantime, I've been amusing myself by reading this. It's an excellent article, written by the author of a major book on Attachment Parenting, that pretty much sums up my feelings on the trend. It might help clarify what I discussed in this post, regarding our certain agreements and disagreements with the philosophy.
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9 comments:
Oops! Now is a good time to know Spanish!
Yeah, don't rub it in.... :P
You know, with a Spanish English Dictionary and your homeschooling skills, you could read it! Just might take a little longer that way;)
I noticed the different right away.... Sorry!!!
I liked the write up you linked to, and I'd love to hear more about your ideas and disagreements with the AP philosophy or philosophies in that book, whichever you were referring to.
Right, Jen, cause I have time to learn a new language right now...
Denise, I was actually in the middle of composing an email to you with tons of links about what we've read about AP. I never finished it. Typical. If I could get a penny for every email I start and never finish...
Lisi: Don't even get me started about unfinished emails!!! Or worse yet, "intended" emails. I am horrible. The worst of the worst. I have been doing a lot of reading, and maybe though of posting all the books I have been going through or have bought/borrowed to get through before Baby Girl comes. That way people can chime in with their thoughts. But as you see, I'm a terrible blogger too. I have the best intentions, I just have horrible follow-through!
You know the issue I have with EVERY article I read about parenting is that EVERY KID IS DIFFERENT! Maybe it's cause I've worked with SO many different kids, but I know that some things work with some kids and some things work with other kids. AP will have a completely different effect on one kid than on another. And the more I read about any of the specific "theories", the less I want to subscribe to any of them. Parenting is a gut instinct, know-your-kid, pay attention, deal with it as it comes, be proactive with safety, teaching, learning, encouraging, disciplining, TEACHING experience. Oh, and did I mention TEACHING?!?!? Our main responisibility is to "TRAIN up a child in the way that he should go". THAT I'll subscribe to wholeheartedly! Teach them the academics. Teach them the life skills. Teach them interpersonal skills. Teach them spiritual discipline. Teach them appropriate behavior and safety precautions. Every day around here is a TEACHING experience. Evie learns so much so fast, I'm amazed -- and have a hard time keeping up. But, I love to watch her grow! It's a heavy responsibility, a child's physical, social, emotional, spiritual health. And YES, I chose to be a parent, so therefore, I AM responsible to that child. You can decide at what point, you are no longer responsible for your child's actions, but in some ways, that responsibility never goes away -- though the personal consequences/backlash might. I'm not saying parents should be held accountable for their adult child's actions. I AM saying that parents need to take a lot more responsibility than some might have us think. Loose parenting has gotten us the last generation of kids that have more problems than ever before -- respect for adults has gone out the window in a high percentage of kids. Respect for themselves and anyone else around them is gone, too. Caring, concern, true love, kindness, graciousness, forgiveness, goodness, charity, joy, patience, (basically all the fruits of the spirit) are lost to most of the "modern" kids. A lot of the fault for that goes to parents who didn't teach their kids that. This is not a "new" thing - changes like this happen over time and generations.
I'll stop now as this is a Huge conversation;)
Right on, Jenny! I, too, find that my focus in parenting is on Teaching. Teaching EVerything. And the books that I like and recommend to others are those that I've found helpful in that goal. I really am going to do a post on AP, but as a preview, one of the things I DON"T like about it is the heavy emphasis on simply loving your child and being with them all the time. There's an idea that this will ultimately and magically produce a well-balanced and well-behaved child. No other input needed.
And Denise, don't even get me started on emails that I intend to write but never even start.... But I have to admit. I am better at regular blogging than you ;P
JK
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